Spiritual growth

When I first started to learn a little bit about the spiritual world, I really thought spiritual growth meant something enlightening. It is, but it’s not like I thought it would be. For one, growth period comes again and again, one after another. Lots of New Age books talk about raising vibration and being positive would reach the certain realm or some sort. I did think that way in the beginning, too but that’s kind of b.s. after experiencing many.

My first year of the spiritual awareness wasn’t fun at all. I was sick all the time. I couldn’t even describe how much fears started to surface strongly. I don’t even know why I kept going forward with that much discomfort. According to the books, it’s supposed to be wonderful and good. Man, I so stopped reading those New Age books after a while. This is not what I agreed upon! That’s what I was shouting silently everyday.

I read the article written by the world known channel Margaret McElroy last night. She was talking about some tool called pyramid which she thought it would make things better, but her channeled spirit, ascended master called Maitreya told her it could make people ill since it would bring the deep buried energies from the centuries ago. That must be a powerful tool. Then, I was thinking that getting sick or becoming ill isn’t a bad thing in my opinion.

Throughout my spiritual learning and experiences, there was never a time I could leap to the next phase lightly. It has been always very uncomfortable, sometimes I got physically ill. At first, it made me worried if I would stay ill. However, as I went through many of those episodes, I learned that when I was moving the heavy duty energies, the physical experiences were also heavy duty. Sure enough, the illness leaves after one week or max two weeks in my case. Knowing that, I don’t freak out about getting ill nowadays.

Still, the physical discomfort is not fun at all. Being sick for one week sounds short, but if the growth period comes one after another, you really don’t feel like you have a sweetness in life. I often thought that I would never do this again because the experience was so intense. The funny thing about our human brains is that it’s made to forget pains after pain is gone. Otherwise, I don’t think I’m still on the spiritual path.

The good news is that when the energy leaves, I realize that what was disabling me or my life so strongly seems to be gone. It’s subtle but is definite. Every time I got strange flu like symptoms with high fevers, I came out lighter than I could remember. Keeping in mind of where it would go after the discomfort really helps. Having amusement helps. Taking a good care of myself helps. Being kind to myself helps.

It’s easier to say when I’m not in the uncomfortable spiritual growth. As I start to enter another spiritual growth now, I’m reminding myself the big picture of the process. When I come out of this, which I don’t know how long this process takes this time, maybe I can share what I learned from this one.