When You Lose Your Grip Or When Something Has Grip On You

Happy Saturday and happy graduation! It makes me think when I graduated the last.. 10 years! Wow! That long! I wrote a blog thinking that I’m free to do something else; however, the topic again rings. So, instead of holding onto the thoughts for the next week or letting go of this, I’ll write it since I got “write about it.” Today’s topic is when you lose your control, what can you do?

I’m forming a class titled “How to shift your stress.” It’s a four-weeks remote class. When I had a really rough time last month, as I going through the process of getting out of the intensity, I had a thought to share how to do in such time. So, I’m doing the class this month, July and August. I’ll continue later on, but I’m not sure the time and dates after September. I might put another form of class, too, so with that, I’m not sure how the schedule works out. I shall let you know.

Anyway, with the thoughts and curriculum of how to shift the energy in you, today was one of the rough day for me. I’m not sure if it was supposed to be that way today, or I accidentally did something to bring it on to myself. Either way, I had one of those dark and thick energy stuck in my space. I have the energetic tools and most of the time, I can clear things out even if it takes more time. Today, I wasn’t sure if I could clear at all. I clear stuff and then when I did something else, the energy came back on me. I started to lose control of my sanity since I just couldn’t clear it out.

I probably mentioned in a couple of the posts ago, but nothing really freaks me out at this point except, when energy doesn’t leave my space no matter what, I do get freak out. Imagine your energy field, aura, chakra and body get thick tar kind of energy sitting in it big time, and no matter what, you can’t remove. If it’s just tar sticking on your skin is one thing, but this tar affects everything in your energy system. My thoughts get absurd. My body is exhausted. My day gets ruined pretty much since nothing can be done except trying to remove this stuff; otherwise, energy gets worse and worse. Anyway, I’m sure I had something like this before, but not too often any more. The last time I got something similar to this was when I started to take over so many classes at once and I started to listen to the complaints from the people in the Zumba class.

Before that, I think I used to have this kind of stuff a lot more often long ago, especially around the time when I started to show up to my teacher’s school. It wasn’t easy at all. I didn’t have tools or experiences to start with. Thinking back then, if I didn’t find my teacher’s spiritual classes, I wonder how hard my life could have been. Anyway, the point is that it was really tough today.

I even emailed my teacher to get some input on it since I just couldn’t shift it. Some people probably call, but I tend to email people unless I’m bleeding to death. I really don’t want to put anyone in the situation of being rushed, pushed or obligated. I know how that energy is like since I get those sometimes from my healees. Besides, I have tools, so I can work on it myself meanwhile. As much as I was quite desperately in struggle, I was working on it one tool at a time.

When everything I could do and the tools I have don’t work well, it’s a little scary. So, I was removing my fear as well. I did again and again start from the basic, one tool at a time, one aura layer and chakra at a time to clear myself. When things got cleared at a moment, I took off to the water front. I knew the energy wasn’t completely clear and I wanted to have nature’s help, too. The drive to the water front was a nightmare, though since everybody was driving!

When I arrived at a water front, as I sat to meditate, I had a subtle thought or rather idea. I double checked with my muscle testing and I got “yes.” So, I decided to say “hi” to the person who seemed to be the source of this tar energy. No response expected, but I said “hi” and simple wish for a good day. That’s all. As soon as I did that, my head tar started to clear up really quickly. My chest tar was leaving. My neck was mobile. While I was noticing that and was also clearing up the energy, I had some strong voices in me telling me something.

The voice was something like this. No matter what, no matter how nasty people could have done to you, no matter what the circumstances are, you never ever want to lose your love and light. You never want to lose your connection to the pure love and light. As I heard it, I nodded and tears were surging. As I opened my eyes, I could feel some energy was still in my space, but it was so doable. That’s my normal daily life of clearing energy sort of tone.

At then, I put my hands in my heart chakra and repeated to myself. No matter what, I cannot lose the connection to the love and light. If my action or inaction is disconnecting myself from love and light, I’m in the wrong spot. I cannot lose my light in my spirit. Tears were still surging up.

As I drove back to my home (or rather Trader Joe for my dinner ideas), I was grateful that I could clear up the tar energy from my space. I don’t know what the fact and what actually brought this in my space, I was grateful that I was connected to the light. Then, I had this reminder of no matter what the circumstances, I can never come from the place disconnected from love and light. Even if I want to just end whatever the source creating the situation, I do from the space of love and light. I think that message to say “hi” and my doing so was coming from the higher vibration. Vibration of love, forgiveness, light, all that.

So, when you’re losing the grip in your life or something has grip on you, do me a favor. Love and forgive instead of holding a grudge or resisting. I wasn’t aware of holding grudge myself today since I was just fighting to remove the tar energy. But, obviously it wasn’t love and light. So, when you’re in the scary spot in life, keep connected to the love and light. If necessary, forgive. Do that for yourself.

With that, have a beautiful graduation weekend! 🙂

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