Sometimes You Have To Take A Look AT Everything In Your Life

Happy Thursday! That’s right, it’s Thursday! This is the first Thursday night I don’t teach Zumba in the evening in the last six month! I got so much done this afternoon after I taught two Zumba classes this morning. I’m so grateful that I could let this evening class go and someone took over the class. I didn’t think it would happen this quick because I just did healing on that last Saturday. Then, I got a call from the coordinator on Monday! So, I tell you that healing really works if you have the right intent and you’re ready to shift energy in your life! Yeah! Today, I’ll write about shifting energy is like doing a major house clean up in Spring! Hence, the title is “Sometimes You Have To Take A Look AT Everything In Your Life!”

This month has been pushing me to take a look at things in my current life. What’s working, what’s not working. Well, in a way everything is working, but is it sufficiently working for me? What’s the energy sucker? What’s the energy blockage? So, the first thing I had to do last month was letting go of the relationship/friendship I had. Then, I got so much more energy in me everyday. Then I had to let go of my good old car friend. Then a new car arrived.

This month I felt things were not moving still. Then I had to take a look at my Zumba gigs. Some classes have been evolving. Some classes have been a drag. With that, I decided to let go of one class which wasn’t working for me and at least it didn’t make much sense for me to do. That was the class slot of tonight. I can now use all Thursday PM for my healing work. I’m so grateful because Zumba is my very side gig. Healing and spiritual work are my primary gig.

This week, things have been speeding up. I have had a packed schedule since Monday. I had to put everything on the list so I wouldn’t miss it (although… I (my head) was off one hour this morning and I was late for subbing Zumba class this morning for the first time.. aarrggg). My phone rings for sub requests everyday. My email is swamped this week. One of the chaos is around a new possibility of teaching Zumba in the different setting, which is cool. It’s been just creating a lot of chaos and interference in my space. However, maybe it was just necessary thing to happen for me to take a look at my space.

When I took a look at my weekly schedule, I have a quite packed schedule. Then how I’m going to put the new Zumba possibility? I gave up Thursday night Zumba, but I’ve already planned to put a remote class for my healing practice. Then, I had to take a look at my Tuesday night clairvoyant assistance, space holder role. I actually had never looked at it in that sense. I always look at from the view of “is this beneficial for me in my spiritual learning, healing learning?” You might know or you might not, when you ask questions in the sixth sensory, spiritual dimensions, you have to be quite specific because things can mean many ways or have many options in the statements.

When I was taking a look at the Tuesday night assistance role, it kept coming back as it’s just not adding up to my benefit in my current life space. I’ve been feeling that I need more evenings opened up. I put two remote class planned in the evening. I teach one evening Zumba. I assist clairvoyant class one evening. I have Wednesday office hour till 9pm so people who work during the day can use my healing services. So, that makes five evenings a week booked already. If I want to do something in the evening, I have to take a look at the Tuesday assistant role. I kept asking questions to myself, to my higher self, to the universe. It has been coming back to me as “let it go.”

So, I emailed my teacher this afternoon. She is out of state till next week, but I had to take an action, knowing that energy works immediately after I shift something. I feel really bad that I have to withdraw from the role I’ve been doing since 2013, but I’ll join her graduate clairvoyant class during the day sometimes. I need all of my energy put in the remote classes I’m trying to put, and my energy and time taken by the assistance role doesn’t add up at this moment.

I don’t know how this affects my life and me to be honest because I just did it. The thing I know for sure was that I wasn’t too excited about the clairvoyant assistant role this week. It felt like a choir and I felt rather irritable. So, that’s sure sign that something isn’t working for me. So, I’ll see what this would do for me. I can always come back to the role in the future class. I want to put all my energy for holding space and teaching my remote classes for now.

So… even though there are certain things in life you do and you don’t question what you do, sometimes you want to take a look at it. What was working for you in the past might not be a present time, meaning it might not be working for you in the same token. You evolve, so your situation and life need to evolve, too.

With that, have an amazing Friday and weekend! ūüôā

Your Own Independence

Happy 4th of July! That’s right, it’s Independence day! Some people must be working like the towing company who towed my car this morning for donation. I hope everyone can get some break and enjoy some strawberry or something today! I’ll write about independence today.

My old car died on the way back from the Zumba gig two weeks ago. I knew my car was getting close to its end, but I wasn’t planning to replace it at this point. I guess I run my life like that, always like that. I get so busy doing stuff, work, stuff, then taking care of myself including car get very last thing. I’m intentionally paying attention to my tendency and working on changing this part of me, but still, it’s very deeply seeded. With that, my car dying was probably the best way to get me do something about the car. The universe has its own way of moving me forward.

In the middle of this car break down process, I only knew to test drive the car I had been looking into for a while. So, I was in the very bad shape that day with all happening at once, I made myself up to go to a dealership to test drive. That’s all I knew I was going to do that day. I wasn’t willing to fix my car because it was just too old for me to maintain any more. The rest is a history. I now have a new car. How it came to my place is not something I knew, but it came with me from the dealership. On the way from the dealership to my home, I dropped by my friend who lived close by to show the car as she requested. At then, she gave me the information about car donation program. The towing company partnership with the organization just towed my car this morning.

As I think of this, maybe it was a perfect day for letting go of my old car. I had that car for years, I mean over 10 years. At that time, I was slowing going back to school. As I was transitioning to the full time student, the financial part had to be catered for school. I knew it would be a long run as I was shooting for a med school. Then, I quit my full time banking job to another. I sold my condo, so I wouldn’t have complicated payment on top of the future schooling.¬†Then, I was thinking that my SUV probably was not suitable for a full time student. While I wasn’t sure what I would do about it, some drunk minor who was at the chase from police smashed my SUV parked at the street parking. It was totaled and I needed a new car. That was my old car I just donated.

So…. my old car was for schooling. It served me very well and although it wasn’t my style (I’m never a sedan person. I’m a hatchback person.), I drove it and took it everywhere. I even went to Southern Utah and Colorado with it. Even after I graduated from school, I focused on something else and had never had a chance to take a look at if my old sedan was suited for me at present time. Who would drive a car or buy a car by thinking that way? Well, I think people who are fond of car probably do it and they’re right to do that.

While I let go of my old car, I realized that I had been working on my independence ever since I moved to the US. I was fairly independent in Japan as I had a pretty good career. After I moved to the US with my ex, I became totally someone else. I felt I was dependent of my ex. I couldn’t do anything on my own. When I couldn’t stand how miserable I became, although I wasn’t independent financially or career wise at that point, I proposed my ex for divorce. I wanted to get myself back. I wanted my independence back.

I¬†had a¬†career before I went back to school, but I know I¬†had been¬†still working on my independence as a person when I went back to school. So, that car knew me and had assisted me throughout my journey of my own independence. I’m grateful that I now realized that the car was outdated for me. It’s not suitable for me any more. I have a full appreciation¬†on that car. Thank you.

I think we’re all working on our own independence. Whatever it means to each of us. It can be career. It can be strength. It can be survival. It can be identity.¬†It can be¬†allowing own personal power. Then, it is a great opportunity to celebrate the Independence Day¬†in our own version of it.

What does your independence mean to you? What kind of independence are you working on? With that thought, let’s celebrate!

Happy 4th! ūüôā

Create and Destroy

Happy Friday! It’s almost Saturday and I should be in bed by now normally. I’ll write before I got to bed tonight. Today’s topic is about destroying phase and creating phase in life.

June has been very challenging for me. I think it started around the end of May, probably around the Memorial weekend. I couldn’t figure out what was up honestly but every morning I woke up with thick energy sitting in my energy field. So, normally my morning meditation and clearing is my peaceful time, but morning this month has been very rather ill feeling. I didn’t know but maybe I was already starting the phase of destroy phase in life.

In order to create a new in life, you have to destroy. I wrote about removing the olds in order to bring the new. It’s the same thing. Sometimes, removing will do. Sometimes, it’s more of destroying in order to create a new thing in life. It’s like life-death cycle. In order to give life in your life, death happens. I’m not talking about someone dying here.

This week, I’m letting go of a friend who hasn’t been good for me. I won’t go too much in details since I know that I’m still in the middle of this process. I still get this friend’s energy gushing into my space and I haven’t had a peaceful space quite yet. I took an action and since then, it’s been really hard for me this week. My empath has been really strong and opened up last few weeks, so I’m super sensitive. I can feel this friend’s energy and it’s really painful because this friend has so much pains. Since I’m an empath and I do care about people, it’s really challenging to let go of someone no matter how it is for my highest good.

While that’s happening, my car broke¬†down on me last night on the way back from a Zumba class. My stress level is way up because of that. I mean, I’ve been having some eating problem¬†from letting go of my friend matter to start with, car breaking¬†down on me is something. I almost thought of cancelling the Zumba class tonight, but I rented a car and went to teach Zumba. If you look at monetary value, that’s probably not the move you do. However, there is more than monetary value in life’s energy circle and I decided that I’ll take the invisible portion by doing so. Now, I have to figure out what to do with my car because I don’t think I’m willing to fix it. Me breaking up with friend; my car breaking up with me….

So, here is the destroy phase. I’m letting go of my friend. I’m also letting go of my good old friend, car. In order to create a new, next best abundance in your life, you have to destroy which are not working for you. My car was definitely ending its life. My friend was sucking my energy out of my life. In fact, I felt like I’m losing my will to live since it’s been so hard with energy gushing into my space. So, I need to let go: destroy phase.

Destroy phase isn’t fun at all. Sometimes you don’t even know if it’s the right thing because it’s a mess and it really doesn’t feel good. It feels awful more likely. Though, when this phase is clear, you have a space for creating a new. Creating the most suitable, next best abundant, new in your life.

When you’re in the destroy phase, don’t be discouraged. It’s not that the universe is against you or bad things keep happening to you. You have to destroy to create a life. You can always ask support from the universe because the universe is always supporting you no matter how you feel. It shall pass. This phase shall pass. Then you get to bring in a beautiful life in you.

With that, have a wonderful weekend! Oh, graduation is always life-death cycle, isn’t it? You complete and you start a new! ūüôā